A Letter to Cole

My dear sweet baby Cole -

Today is our last day at home together before you start daycare on Monday. I cannot believe that you're now 14 weeks old. The time at home with you has flown by and it has been wonderful. Things were much different than when I stayed home with Eli. You're a different baby and I'm a different Mommy now. You see, Eli broke me in. I had no idea what to do with a baby when he was born. Sure I could change a diaper as good as anyone but I worried too much about what books said I should do and tried to do them. With you, I let you lead. Sometimes book knowledge is too much and you need to do what your head and heart tell you are right. We had a lot of good days together, some exceptionally great and an occasional bad afternoon or morning. I made it through the "bad times" much better than with Eli. I was more calm and relaxed this time and made it a point to focus on you instead of worrying about all the stuff I could or should have been doing around the house. You know, I never once called your Daddy at work in tears saying I couldn't do it (I really did that with your brother!). Some days I was more tired than others but that happens. Some days you were happier than others. But we made every day count together.

You are such a happy baby. Right now you are smiling and laughing, making the cutest sounds - I've figured out your tickle spots so I get to hear you laugh quite a bit. You're so laid back that you make being your Mommy easy, relatively speaking. You're holding your head up very well and we've been practicing sitting in the bumbo chair. It won't be long and you'll be in the u-chair at school and your exersaucer. I say that but I know I'll blink and you'll be walking.

Monday is a new chapter for our family - your first day at school. Eli has been going to Primrose since he was your age. I cried and felt so guilty when we took him for the first day. But I don't feel that way this time. I will truly miss you during the day but the teachers at Primrose are like family now. I'm not scared and I trust them with you. I know you will be very well taken care of and will grow and learn a tremendous amount there, more than I could teach you at home by myself. Our days and nights will be a little more busy and routine but we will be a happy family. I will miss our snuggles on the couch, walks and visiting friends during the day - I'll just have to catch up at night and on weekends!!

Thank you Cole for a wonderful maternity leave. I am so lucky and blessed to have you as my son.

All my love - Mommy